In recent times, there have been so many cheating scandals that have come to light ranging from Jeff Bezos to Jay Z to Ashton Kutcher. 

According to the recent General Social Survey (GSS), 20% of men and 13% of women reported that they’ve had sex with someone other than their spouse while married.

If you are the injured party, it is often devastating and blindsiding to deal with the aftermath. When your partner succumbs to a moment of weakness, you are often left reeling from the pain asking yourself “When did we drift apart and why did he/she do this to me?” 

People have been so used to infidelity that most of them no longer pay much attention to it. But, many of you will surely agree that cheating has become more prominent or more prevalent these days.

The question now is: who cheats more?

There are different reasons for infidelity in both long term and marital relationships. Women and men alike have been engaging in adulterous acts since ancient times. However, when it comes to the question of “who cheats more men or women,” men tend to be more linked to this issue. Yet, both men and women can cheat because of the same reasons.

What Can Be Considered as Cheating?

Before anything else, it is a must to remember that there are actually different forms of cheating. Many people associate the term with physical acts of infidelity. However, cheating on someone can also happen emotionally. When you speak of emotional cheating, this is where you share your deepest and most private thoughts with another person aside from your spouse or partner that breaks the fundamental bonds that keep the marriage or relationship together.

Why are Men Believed to Cheat More than Women?

Men are deemed to have higher tendencies to cheat compared to women due to their stronger sexual impulses according to a new study.

Earlier research suggested that it is more likely for men to be unfaithful since their self-control is lesser. Unlike women, men were more inclined to act on the inappropriate attraction without showing weaker attempts for controlling their desire compared to women. Men instead chose to pursue other women due to the stronger sexual impulses they feel.

While both men and women have lots of self-control, the moment a man fails to exhibit this self-control, they will have quite strong sexual impulses. This is the time when cheating takes place.

Even though men can display better control than women, they have a stronger impulse to pay attention to someone they found desirable.

A good explanation for this is that men tend to focus on the physical attractiveness of the opposite sex. The result is that men are more prone to feel drawn on impulse to the attractive targets even if men don’t have any control over the attention they give.

Another reason why men cheat more than women is because of evolution. Studies found out that the evolutionary origin of sexual impulses is older than that of self-control that could have changed not so long ago, for the past 50,000 years or so, as a means of controlling sexual urges that might have posed a threat to the ability of the Homo sapiens to abide by the rules of the cultural norms and act as valued members of the group.

Simply put, since time immemorial, the sexual impulses of men are stronger than women. However, they were able to develop the ability to control such desires so that they wouldn’t engage in sexual behavior with another woman outside of marriage, for example, and be considered an outcast in the society.

Some questions we ask: 

1. What is the difference between physical and emotional cheating? (2:00)
2. Do men or women cheat more? (3:00)
3. Do unhappy or unfulfilled people cheat? (4:00) 
4. What do factors like age, maturity, newness of relationships have to do with cheating? (5:00)
5. What is revenge cheating? (6:00)
6. How do you find evidence of an emotional affair without breaching your partner’s privacy? (7:00) 
7. Are you gardening the seeds of your relationship every day? (8:00)

In this episode, we talk about different types of cheating in relationships and preventative measures. 

What is the algorithm for staying faithful? Have those uncomfortable conversations with your partner, check-in, and make sure you are growing together!