Top 20 Rules For Life
Top 20 Rules For Life
After reading Jordan B Peterson’s 12 rules for life, I got to thinking…what would be my rules for life at this point? I am sure they’d change as I grow and evolve as a person.
What do you all think? Do you have rules for life that you follow? Or is it as simple as “Rule #1 – There are no rules”?
Here are mine:
1. You give your life meaning. No one else does.
Whatever you want out of life, you get to decide. You get to choose. You’ve been given an unknown amount of time on this planet, and you get to decide how you’d like to spend it. The time will pass no matter what.
Do you want to live a life of meaning? Of purpose? With intention? Whatever it is you choose, do not let anyone else interfere with the way you have chosen your life to be.
2. Use negative emotions towards building something positive.
Heart break? Got fired from a job? Lost a friend or family member? Angry? Depressed? Afraid? If you feel anything negative, figure out how to turn it to build something positive.
After losing my dad suddenly after a heart attack, I decided I wanted to do 2 things. 1 – Take out my anger at the gym. This would help with my physique and health. 2 – Face my fear of not being able to provide for my family. I did this by going to the library and reading books about financial independence. This has helped me view money in a way that I never looked at before, and life is simple now. Check out Rich Dad, Poor Dad by the way. Game changer in how you look at money and financial independence.
3. Make time for friends and family that bring you joy.
If life goes by in a blink of an eye, then don’t you want to make sure it was fun? That it was an adventure?
We are all so busy running around that when given the opportunity to spend time with friends or family that truly bring us joy, we postpone it as a task that can be done later. Please make the time, as it will bring you joy and will make this journey of life that we are all on, a lot more fun.
4. Remain in the present moment.
This is the toughest thing to do. We are either thinking about the past, or the future. The past is a memory, and the future is your imagination. Neither of those are real right now. One trick that I’ve turned into a habit is to be grateful for anything that I eat or drink, especially before a meal. I take time to say thank you in my head, and remember where I am. I think about all my senses, and take in the feeling of smell, touch, sound, taste, and sight.
5. Be willing to invest in yourself.
I’ve asked some of my closest friends what is the best advice your parents have given you. And I’ve heard anything from “Believe in God”, to “Always wear nice shoes”. One advice that has really stuck with me is that always be willing to spend money on knowledge, and appearance.
Knowledge to be better than you are today, whether it’s through books, documentaries, or lunches with mentors. Appearance entails grooming, hygiene, and clothes. Now, I’m not saying go purchase the fanciest and most expensive clothes, shoes, and watches, however, to be conscious of how you are presenting yourself. In this day and age, you don’t have to spend a lot to look and feel like a million bucks.
6. Simplify your life. Learn to say “No.”
Your time is the most valuable asset you have. Time is something no one can buy. Simplify what you want to do with it. Prioritize the right people, the right projects, and activities that bring you joy. Over the last few years, I’ve slowly started spending less and less time with people that drain my energy. This has helped tremendously as the time I now have is being spent towards the things that bring me joy.
7. Always be grateful for what you have.
You’re reading this right now. Most likely on a mobile device. You have the internet. You’re breathing. You have a lot to be thankful for. Take the time daily to be thankful for the people, the things, and the life you do have at the moment. It could always be worse.
8. Have a self care day (AKA “Treat Yo Self Day”)
How often do we get caught up from task to task to task, and never get to sit down and just relax, and enjoy our day? We need to schedule time for a week long vacation when we are close to burn out.
Imagine a day where you can sleep in without an alarm. You can wake up and make or order your favorite breakfast/brunch. Watch your favorite movie. Listen to your favorite songs. Take a long hot shower/bubble bath. Eat at your favorite restaurant. Read your favorite book in silence. Go to the beach. Get a massage. How does that sound? How about doing it once a month, or once every 2 months?
9. Live like a tree.
Do you know what the main life goal of a tree is? It’s to live up to it’s fullest potential. It does not concern itself with how well other trees are doing. It enjoys the breeze, the water, takes in the views, and hopefully bears fruit. It does not choose to settle up to a certain point. It MUST live up to it’s fullest potential. Live like a tree.
10. Do not hesitate to take risks. In career, relationships, and investments.
I see so many people playing defense their whole lives. Avoiding bad things from happening instead of playing offense and making things happen. Think about areas of your life you’re playing defense in, and go try playing offense. As it’s been said, rage against the dying of the light. Do not go gentle into that good night.
"Rage against the dying of the light. Do not go gentle into that good night."
11. You have the ability to create and re-invent yourself at any given moment.
The human potential is unlimited. You become what you think. The past is done. You get to decide every single day when you wake up, who you want to be, and how you want to live your life.
12. If you want something, try asking for it.
I’ve been really bad at this my whole life. As a shy kid, and really a shy, introverted adult, I would never ask for things I wanted. I felt that people that did were selfish, and I looked down upon them. No more. Always ask. The worse thing that can happen is a “no”.
13. Have Integrity: Show Up. Keep Your Word.
I once went to a try out. Embarrassed to say about what, but I showed up. Only 4 others were there. The venue needed 20. I made it. Why? I showed up. When everyone else expected to not get a chance at this, they didn’t even show up. Show up, and keep your word. This is what separates the best from the rest. Look at any athlete, any entrepreneur, anyone great at what they do. They didn’t just happen overnight. They showed up.
Every. Single. Day.
14. Spend time with children and elders.
Spending time with people on each end of the age spectrum will always give you perspective. Being around children will remind you of what it’s like to be playful and live carefree, which is something we should all learn to emulate.
At some point, we all “grew up” and decided to take on all the stressors of being an “adult”. Spend time with elders, soak in all their knowledge and wisdom. Learn about their lessons, and what life has been like for them.
15. Don’t make big life decisions after a big life event.
How many of us have called our exes after a break up, or gone out and had a one night stand or a fling right after, so that the pain of the heartbreak is masked?
After I lost my dad, I immediately donated all his clothes and shoes. 5 years later, I wish I kept a few of those things. It may not have seemed like a big life decision at the time, but letting go of all his belongings days after his death is a big decision.
Be patient during these times. Let the emotions heal. Once this has happened, you can think logically about how you’d like to proceed.
16. Always be curious.
No matter how smart you are, chances are you don’t know everything about everything. Live like a child and be curious about how things work.
Also, be curious about people. Don’t be snoopy, but ask them questions about their life, and the decisions they’ve made. This will make you a great conversationalist. It baffles me how many people are terrible at asking questions to keep a conversation going. Don’t be so hard on yourself when you try this. If you’d like to learn more, feel free to grab a copy of “How To Win Friends And Influence People”. Published in 1936, this classic by Dale Carnegie still holds true today.
17. Never, Ever, Ever Complain. No one cares.
Your mom may actually be the only one that cares to listen. I can’t tell you how many people I hear complain, and I feel like shaking my head and walking away. 80% of people don’t care, and 20% are glad it’s you. My advice here: If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change the way you think about it.
"If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change the way you think about it."
18. Manners maketh man.
“Please” and “Thank you” still go a long way. And despite what was said on Seinfeld, “Grace” can be learned. Think in terms of charisma, elegance, poise, and grace. What do these terms mean to you? What is the first thing you imagine when you read these? Most likely it’s positive. Aim to be it.
19. Be loyal. Especially to those who were there for you during your hard times.
Everyone will come to your party, but not everyone will come to your funeral. People enjoy the good times, but it’s the friends and family that are there for you during the hard times, that are pure gold. You may not need to hang out with them everyday, but make sure you always remember the time they were there for you.
20. Take care of your health.
Life is a fun adventure. Enjoy it all, and take it all in. The ups, and the downs. It’s all part of it. If you’ve never experiences sadness, you may not understand happiness. If you’ve never been poor, you won’t understand rich. Life can be a dichotomy, an expression of polar extremes. But, to enjoy it all, you must be present. So take care of yourself, and enjoy the ride.
I’d love to hear from you. What are your top rules for life? Feel free to add in the comments section below.